One rainy day a man noticed a drip coming from the ceiling in his house. The man got upset and told the leak to spot leaking. He even told the leak that he was disappointed in its actions. Yet the leak kept going. As the sun came through the window the leak stopped, the man in joy said, I have fixed the problem. The leak has listened to me. He noticed that the ceiling only leaked when it rained. So, he prayed sunny days so the leak would not happen. But, over time the man realized that to truly solve the problem he needed rain to help me find all the holes in the roof. The rain exposed the holes, soon the man began to see the rain as a blessing, without rain he would never had known the problems.
When it comes to parenting many times we address the behavior without focusing on the real problem, the heart of the child. As parents we are like the man that thinks he stopped the leak or we just pray for sunny days so we can avoid the leaks.
We need to get to the root of the problem. We need to parent in a way that reveals the child’s heart-first to the parents and then to the child. Do we see the times of disobedience as an opportunity given by God to shepherd their heart? Or is a disobedient child just a nuisance that needs to be corrected. Do we only pray for sunshine or do we pray for God to expose the issues or holes in the roof?
Here is a great interview with Paul Tripp about this topic
Blog by Tim Yorgey