To go or not to go…that is the question



Mommy can we….? This is a statement that we hear all throughout the day. How do we determine as a family what we are going to do and why we are going to do it? The world around us is continually giving more and more options. Each family has been given the same amount of time each week, but each family does not do the same things with their time. With all the options in this world,how does a family decide what is best?

We need families to be proactive when looking at their weekly schedule instead of just reacting to the outside pressures on their time. In order to do this we as parents need to understand what it important and what is secondary.

At the root of every decision is the question, “Which world am I preparing my child for-this world or the next?’

If you want to explore this topic more and have a chance to become a more focused family. Come to the Proactive Parenting class this Saturday August 19th, 9-11 am at Calvary Community Church, Williams Bay, Wisconsin. If you are planning on coming email me at

What happened today at school?….Nothing


nothing sign.jpg


I was a teacher for 12 years and I can assure you that things actually happen at school from the time you drop off your teen until you pick them up. One of the struggles of parenting teens is communication. Many parents want to talk with their teens about what happened during their day, but they struggle with asking the right questions. Proverbs 12:25 (ESV) “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.”


Here are a couple of insights from a teacher to a parent.

  1. School is not home. Home for many teens is a safe place away from school pressures (not for all). Your teen just got home and may not want to relive the whole day right away. Give them time to mentally unwind.
  1. A lot happens during the day at school. Here are things that may happen in a normal day of school: couples begin dating, break up and get back together several times a day, words are spoken in jest and haste but continue to dwell in the heart, and worldviews are continually challenged and displayed by teachers as well as peers. Each period and between each period many words are spoken and emotions are displayed which affect a teen’s life. So, in one day a teen has experienced a roller coaster of emotions, and they need a listening ear to help them process issues with their still developing mindset.
  1. When your teen gets home, ask questions about specific aspects of the day. Who did you sit with at lunch? Did you get any graded assignments back? If your teen disappears into their room, a great way to get them to come to the kitchen and talk with you is by making a simple snack and talking with them while they eat. Take time to clear your schedule at some point in the evening. This is a treasured time in your child’s life. God has given them amazing minds for thinking, and parents to help them in the development of their thinking before releasing them out on their own.   Proverbs 25:11 (ESV) “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.”


The best way to keep conversations going is to make the conversation simple and to the point. One important thing to remember when talking to a teen is that school drama for them is real life. As a parent, you need to help them walk through the drama in a God-honoring way and not get involved in the drama as a parent.  II Timothy 2:16 (ESV) “But avoid irreverent babble, for it will lead people into more and more ungodliness,”


By T. Yorgey

Ruts: The Way of a Woman…It’s a Good Thing: Part II



You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” Psalm 16:11


Last week we looked at four points in regards to raising up our young ladies to be women of character. Our prayer should be, as we face the world’s ideas of beauty, desire and fame is that God will use us as vessels of honor for His glory alone.

Our daughters need to be loved, cherished and protected—not desired, worshiped, and ignorant of what this world claims as glorious and good.

Four more traits of truth that can be prayed over our daughters ultimately will point toward the Giver of all good gifts.


  1. Serves Cheerfully: “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus…” Philippians 2. True beauty comes not only from within but that very beauty from within has a source as well. Christ is the very Source of True Beauty and through a changed, contrite, humbled heart God can work. Then, and only then, can we serve cheerfully as unto the LORD. Serving with nothing expected in return is what Christ showed us in His life and death and it was we are called to do. It is a hard task, but by the power of the Holy Spirit—serving others cheerfully can be accomplished. It is also important to recognize that Christ is the Rewarder and the Reward of living a life of service here on earth. To teach toward the eternal and not the temporal should be at the forefront of our hearts according to our Father God, who is the Giver of every good and perfect gift (James 1:17). Psalm 116:16, Matthew 20:28, Luke 22:26-27, Hebrews 13:1-3, 16, Psalm 100:1-5.
  2. Stands Strong: “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the time to come.” Proverbs 31:25. A woman has the privilege to be diligent in any duty God places in her path. Now there is a difference in being busy and being a hard worker. Wisdom and discernment must be prayerfully asked for according to what tasks are most important and how many tasks she should wisely undertake. Knowing that all strength comes from God will help with completing a task well and as doing them as unto the LORD instead of an “I can do this all by myself” attitude. Another aspect to standing strong is remaining firm in the faith according to the Truth. It is important to teach the truth of Scripture and that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God and He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. In this day of a lack of logic and absolute Truth, it is crucial to pray over and instill the Absolute Truth of God’s Word into the tender hearts of our girls. Our prayer should be that they would be strong women of honor and beauty–changed by the very God who breathed air into their lungs and breathes life into their very hearts. I Corinthians 15:13, Colossians 1:23, Ephesians 6:11, I Peter 5:9, Hebrews 3:14, 4:14, Joshua 1:9, Psalm 27:14, Deuteronomy 31:6.
  3. Seeks Christ: “Blessed are those who keep his statutes and seek him with all their heart.” Psalm 119:2. May we teach our daughters that nothing satisfies other than Christ Himself (John 11:25-26)! Do we show them we thirst?—He is the Living Water! Do we show them we hunger?—He is the Bread of Life! Through Him we are creatures of the Creator—we may become daughters of the Divine and sheep of the True Shepherd. This world will offer glitter and gold that will pass away with created time, but His glorious radiance will never fade and at His right hand are pleasures forevermore (Psalm 16:11). May they see that He is not only the Rewarder but the Reward of those who trust in Him and diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6). Matthew 6:33, Isaiah 55:6, Matthew 7:7-8, Psalm 63:1, I Chronicles 16:11, Psalm 34:10, Amos 5:4.
  4. Sees God: “Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!” Romans 11:33. The engine which propels all hearts, thoughts, motives and desires—the truth that drives us to our knees and to Look up and Live is God the Father Himself! His attributes and His ways are vast and beyond measure. He is boundless, measureless, limitless, uncreated, all-knowing, and all-powerful. When we begin to see Him in His true majesty and holiness and see that He is Sovereign over all, then and only then will we know how much we need Christ in order to stand before the Perfect Sovereign of all. Our daughters must see God in His fullness, through His written Word in order to see who they truly are—a sinner in need of a Savior from the wrath of God. He is the Father of Lights of whom there is no variation or shifting. He is Father God, who gives every good and perfect gift in accordance to His will and good pleasure—for it is all for His fame and glory (James 1:17). He is the very definition of beauty and goodness and from Him all good and beauty flows. May we teach our daughters to see God and study His awesome attributes, that we may see the Otherness of God the Father. Isaiah 6:3, 29:19, Jeremiah 10:12, 23:23-24, Psalm 27:5, 99:2-3, 115:3, 139, Exodus 34:6-7, 3:5-6, Malachi 3:6, Acts 17:27-28, Revelation 4:8.                                                                                                                                                                                                  -by A. Yorgey